Personal style. You hear about it, you know it, but do you have yours nailed down? I feel like personal style is a buzz word that comes easy for some but makes others weary. For a while now I’ve wanted to write a post and essentially create a blog series about finding your sense of style and being confident in shopping for and wearing what you love. I am a huge proponent of dressing for yourself and not for others or for a specific trend. I love it when people are confident in something that is out of the ordinary, out of trend, or even just their own perfect combination of something I’d never think to pair together. All of that is personal style. When you buy clothing just because you like it and know you will wear it well, not just because you saw it in the newest ads and figured you should hop on the bandwagon, that’s personal style. Today I plan to walk you through how to find your own personal style, sift through trends, and feel confident in what you buy. Stay tuned for future posts regarding this topic!
my outfit details: pink set- Zara // handbag // headband // shoes // earrings- Old J.Crew, linked similar
Ok so let’s set the scene.
You know how you see those videos on Tik Tok or Instagram Reels where people look back at cringey outfits they wore in high school, college, etc? Why does everyone think those are so cringey? Because most of those outfits are full of trends. While trends are great and fuel the fashion industry, they are often the items we look back on and say “I can’t believe I wore that” or “we all looked terrible”. If you are only dressing like everyone else is around you, you are limiting your style to the current trends you can shop. Then when those go out of style, you find new items that are trendy. How can you avoid buying things just because they are trendy? I am going to give you tips to find your true style and avoid fashion waste, style burnout, and feeling like your outfits look cringey. Let’s walk through it.
// my tips for finding your personal style //
- Pick and choose what you like
- If you buy only what is trending, you will most likely be throwing out your clothes frequently at the start of each season, or hoarding a bunch of items that you might deem “cringey” or basic now but hope will be in style again (I’m looking at you y2k crop tops, loose baggy jeans, smocked ruffle skirts, etc). These are all trends. My recommendation is to be selective in what trends you like. For example, this season I love the retro-inspired pieces a lot of brands are putting out. While this will probably be trendy for a year or two, many people who buy simply what is in style will be getting rid of those items by 2024. However, I personally love retro-inspired items and love to incorporate 1960s elements in my style. So if I buy something that is trendy according to Zara or Shein from brands I really like or shopping secondhand, if I truly love the item, I can probably incorporate it into my wardrobe for years to come.
- Maybe that example wasn’t helpful. Let’s talk about another trend. Tie-dye. Everyone obsessed over tie-dye during the height of quarantine. Personally, I don’t like tie-dye. So I didn’t buy it. If you absolutely LOVE tie-dye and wore it before it was trending during the pandemic, or you have found your new fave pattern, then buying tie-dye was right for you. But as we are now seeing, tie-dye is going out of trend, and now you might start to regret buying all that tie-dye. It’s totally ok to buy trends and wear it a few times, but consider how wearing something only while on trend and then giving it away or hiding it in the back of your closet isn’t doing justice for your closet or personal style.
- Trends I’ve fallen for… that is probably a novel. I bought a ton of star jewelry last summer when it was really big. honestly just got it because everyone was wearing it. And now I have about 5 pieces of star jewelry that just isn’t me and I don’t want to wear again. If stars have a special meaning to you or you just have a thing with stars (I have a thing with heart jewelry), then buy those stars girl. But if you are just buying it because everyone else is, maybe it’s best to avoid.
- Finally, another anecdote to make my point clear. I LOVE puff sleeves. These extra sleeves have been trending for a few seasons now, but I can imagine that they will be on the out in a few seasons. However, I love them. I have bought a few puff-sleeved items that flatter me and are of decently high quality, and I plan to wear them when they are out of style. I might not wear them as often, but I hope I will wear them sporadically over the next few years. If you find pieces during trends that you absolutely love and will wear when it is out of style, then you are finding your true sense of style.
- Quality > Quantity.
- I know it’s fun to browse SheIn and rack up your cart with dozens of items. But let’s be honest, you won’t be wearing the majority of those items in a few years. Why? Because you are buying fast-fashion and, again, trends. Companies like SheIn (and honestly most fashion brands), sacrifice quality to quickly put out inventory that is up to trend and will sell well. Because the trend cycle moves so quickly, they want you to buy their items fast at low prices. Your SheIn items look cute for a few months, but soon SheIn will be onto the next trend.
- Instead of buying a ton of items on trend, stick to brands you love such as small businesses, specific designers you like, and buying singular items rather than a bunch of the same thing. Look for items that you can wear again and again, as well as envision wearing in more than just one way.
- Brands I like to shop at: Tuckernuck, J.Crew, Anthropologie (specifically the Maeve brand), ModCloth, Ann Taylor, etc. I also buy a lot secondhand from places like Poshmark, Etsy, and Facebook Buy/Sell/Trade groups.
- Can you wear something more than once? If not, let’s not buy it
- So you found a super eclectic top that you can only envision wearing one way. You buy it for $80, wear it to a fun dinner, and then never wear it again. You cannot think of other ways to wear it, and you really don’t want to repeat your outfit again in the next year or two. This happens, but it can be easily avoidable when you are comfortable in your personal style. I try to buy items I can envision wearing in multiple ways. If I see a cute, funky blouse at the store, I try to stop myself and think of how much wear I can get out of it. Questions I ask include: where can i wear this (dinner, work, party, shopping, etc.); what can I wear this with (does it only look good with white jeans, have to wear it with heels, etc); when can I where this (only during the summer, just with this group of friends, only when I’m on dates). If you feel like you can get a good use out of something (for example: where on a date, put under a blazer for work, where to brunch, where with a skirt, etc), then it looks like a good item! If you only hit one or two criteria, think hard before you buy it. But if you absolutely love it and just cannot live without it, buy it but don’t make that a habit!
- Make a list of elements and colors you like in clothing, and stick with it.
- I challenge you to write out a list of elements and colors you like in clothing. These can be current trends, but also just things you look for when shopping (we all have that right?). Try to stick with these elements, even if they are not on trend. Here is an example of things I tend to look for:
- Puff sleeves
- Slingback heels and block heels
- Gem tones (I’m a winter color palette and these look best on me)
- A-line mini skirts
- White sneakers
- Disc earrings
- Exaggerated floral print
- Velvet
- Ruffles
- Pink
- Bows
- Vintage-inspired
- Black and white
- Ballet flats
- Straight/skinny and flare crop jeans
- Tortoiseshell
- piping and trim on clothes
- tweed
- school girl skirts
- You’ll note that a lot of the elements I listed above aren’t what is conventionally in style at the moment. However, I like these items and have items with these elements that have been in my closet since high school or are brand new. A great example is ballet flats. Many people think these are out of style. My take? I like how they look. They are comfortable, casual, and look elegant. So I’ll buy them even if people think they aren’t trending.
- I challenge you to write out a list of elements and colors you like in clothing. These can be current trends, but also just things you look for when shopping (we all have that right?). Try to stick with these elements, even if they are not on trend. Here is an example of things I tend to look for:
- Similar to the above tip, look for trends already in your closet
- Do you have a lot of florals? Neutrals? Only black? Wear a lot of skinny jeans or wedges or boots? Keep note of the duplicate items in your closet that you wear a lot, and those that you don’t. Have 5 cold shoulder tops from 3 years ago that you never wear anymore? Throw them out. Have 6 fit and flare dresses that you don’t think are in style but you love them anyways? That’s your style. Keep them. Compare this list to items you want to look for in stores.
- Find your staples
- I’ve written a couple blog posts about staple items to have in your closet (fall essentials, spring essentials, timeless essentials), but these can definitely vary by person, personal style, and by season. If you keep these items in your closet, you can effortlessly incorporate them into your style and have a timeless wardrobe. Here are a few must-haves for my closet:
- well-fitting jeans (I have skinny, flare crop, straight leg, white jeans, and a nice pair of black jeans on repeat)
- white button up
- neutral jacket (like an army jacket or trench coat)
- wool coat
- white sneakers
- layering sweater
- navy blazer
- jean jacket
- black mini skirt
- a nice dress suit (blazer + skirt or blazer + pants)
- classic white blouse
- little black dress you love
- classic pearl or gold jewelry
- black or white headband
- leather jacket
- lightweight silk or fabric scarf (can be worn around neck, as a hairpiece, tied on bags, etc.)
- I’ve written a couple blog posts about staple items to have in your closet (fall essentials, spring essentials, timeless essentials), but these can definitely vary by person, personal style, and by season. If you keep these items in your closet, you can effortlessly incorporate them into your style and have a timeless wardrobe. Here are a few must-haves for my closet:
- Tailor your items
- I have several pieces of clothing I haven’t worn since buying because I need them tailored. I plan to get them tailored when I move, and then evaluate if I still want to wear these things. If your clothes fit well, you will want to wear them again and again.
- Follow a few fashion bloggers/influencers that you love
- As a blogger, I follow roughly 1000 brands and bloggers/influencers by default. However, on my personal Instagram, I only follow about 5. I have a few bloggers/influencers that are my “fashion icons”, and I tend to buy what they share. Find bloggers that share fashion that you like. Look for bloggers that share quality over quantity (I cannot stand when bloggers share a million must-haves and new favorites per day, it’s not sustainable). Look to these bloggers for fashion advice, how to follow trends within your style, and for styling advice.
- My favorite bloggers: Lonestar Southern, Lindy Goodson, Shelby Taylor, Ultra Sophisticate, Louise Montgomery, Belle of the Ball (there are probably more but these were who I thought of first!)
- Know WHAT TO AVOID when shopping:
- Things you don’t feel good in
- Buying something just because someone else has it or you saw it on Instagram
- Buying something just because it is trendy
- Low quality, cheap items
- Stuff that doesn’t fit but you want to fit when you reach xxx goal weight or body type
- Things you might only wear once
- Something that’s on sale (would you buy it if it were full priced? If not, then it’s not for you!)
- Know WHAT TO LOOK FOR when shopping:
- Anything that fits your style elements list
- Basics you don’t already have
- Things that make you happy and you feel like you can’t live without
- Items you can envision more than one outfit in
- High quality basics and investment pieces
- Items you feel confident in
- Colors, prints, shapes, silhouettes that flatter you and compliment your features
- Things you have been eyeing for months
So this was definitely an overload of information, but I seriously enjoy talking about this. If you’re lost in your personal style, I think it’s important to go over why you aren’t happy with your style, pick out the things you love, and build your closet from a few staple basics. Stick around on the blog for more posts relating to this topic, and head to my Instagram + Tik Tok for videos regarding these very topics!
xoxo,
Madison
